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Sad Brunch

by Ramona (USA)

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1.
Tarantism 02:04
Don’t smile you idiot. With every grin you’re digging your own depression. Your grave? You wish. Oh boy this is so much worse. You should know better. You’re not the best at pattern recognition. Learn the dance. One step forward, two steps back. And I don’t, no and I don’t, have a plan. You should know me. I’m the monster living in your dreams. You can’t sleep because you’re scared that I’ll be there. And I don’t, no and I don’t, have a plan. And I’m ready to admit my loneliness is self-processed. And when my head hits the ground, I pray that I’m down but not out. And I don’t, no and I don’t, have a plan. And I don’t, no and I don’t, have a chance.
2.
Can you tell I’m going insane? It’s hard as hell to start again every day. What can I do? I’m running away. You ran first so I know I’m not to blame. This engine’s broken. I’m born to run. My problems are nothing where I come from. I wish you would spare me. Let me rot alone. And I don’t care if you’re doing better because I feel just the same. Once again I’m shouting out loud. A cry for help or something to bring me down. I need hope or a way to cope. I need to find an escape route. Starting to consider myself a fraud. Said I could handle this. Said I was strong. You’re not the only one who thought I was wrong. And I don’t care if you’re doing better because I feel just the same. You’re a coward and a liar, but you’re the one I love. Thought I could give you mine and you’d give me yours. But it’s not that simple. No it never is. I should have seen it coming. It’s my fault not yours. And I don’t care if you’re doing better because I feel just the same.
3.
I know who I am, you can’t tell me. I spent too long being defined by everything but me. The car, the house, the 9-5, yeah that’ll keep me happy. But there’s a part of me --- unstable as it is --- that just loved waking up and feeling like shit. I know who I am, you can’t tell me. I’ve thought about growing up and what it means. It means being able to sleep at night with the decisions that I make. I know who the fuck I am and I can’t believe I was willing to let a piece of me die, to live a fucking lie. I’ve found a happiness in playing music with my friends. And I find a loneliness again and again. But I wouldn’t change a thing. Because I can say for me, that I gave it my best. I know who I am.
4.
All Eyes 01:34
5.
I wanted to be able to say, “I’m doing so much better than the last time that you saw me. I go to sleep by ten, sometimes later on the weekend. And I feel so connected to everything and everyone. It’s exhilarating.” But that would be a lie. I’m doing a little better. But I’m just not that guy. It’s tough being around you because you knew me back when. Back when I was funnier and brighter, not just bummed out and tired. These expectations are killing me. Like I’m supposed to be someone I wish I could be. I’m not quite better but I’m getting there. And in a quiet moment, I find I kind of like myself. And some days the anger returns and I have to find a reason to smile. Because you’re only as stable as your last breakdown. And I don’t think I’m able to understand the world right now. I’m not quite better but I’m getting there. I’m not quite better yet. I’m not quite better but I’m getting there.
6.
These Days 03:54
Tough times, yeah they came then gone but they always left me restless. Somehow when things got bleak I was never feeling hopeless. What have I got to complain about? I was never abandoned. Certainly left alone, but with you I was never stranded. And the more that I look back, I can’t believe we made it. Whole days by the flower pots, anything to escape it. And ma, yeah she cried a lot but we never were defeated. We always seemed to find a laugh hidden somewhere in the basement. And how can I say thanks for all that you meant, and all that you did, and all that you’ve done? And how can I be enough to thank you for the those things and all that you’ve done? And all that you’ve done. Times where it felt like all we had was anger. Sat up late on our beds seething with hatred. Drowned all our thoughts out in all the old records. Those chords, each other, was all I ever needed. And how can I say thanks for all that you meant, and all that you did, and all that you’ve done? And how can I be enough to thank you for the those things and all that you’ve done? And all that you’ve done.

about

Ramona would like to thank:

The Vera Project and everyone involved in recording --- we appreciate all the help! Tony Archer and Bomb Pop for putting this out. Yosef for creating obscenely great artwork. A huge thank you to all the people who have helped make this city feel like home from the Kraken crew to Yorushiku Ramen, to the Victory/Black Lodge people, to the various basements and houses we’ve played/spent time in. Hugs & kisses to Chase, Jordan, Ryan and the rest of the Sigh Squad. And thank you to all the amazing bands we love playing music with (in no particular order): Blyss, CJ & the Dead Bars Boyz, Wild English, Screaming Multitudes, Listen Lady, TV Ugly, Supermoon, Husky Boys, Babe Waves, Rebuilder, Pity Party, Slow Code, Yr Parents, Bobby’s Oar, Difficult Children, Fair Lady, Hard Sulks, Basic Maintenance, Young Go-Hards, Burn x3, and too many other bands that we’re going to feel bad about forgetting.

credits

released October 3, 2016

Ramona is:
Abby Vigderman – Bass/Vox
Diego medrano – Guitar/Vox
Shannon Ledbetter – Drums
All lyrics by Diego medrano
Additional “keyboards” by Sal Medrano

Sad Brunch was recorded at the Vera Project in Seattle, WA by:
Engineer: Burgess Carleton & Korey Armstrong
Producer: Sal Medrano
Mixing/Mastering: Nick Biscardi
Snoring: Chase Culver

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Ramona (USA) Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

are you having fun yet?

Diego
Abby
Shannon

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